Peer Reviews
Here's what a star student thought of this essay
Quality of writing
The role of catalysts common is left blank, so it looks untidy, and should either be completed or not included at all if is not relevant. The overall essay would have looked better in an essay format rather than tables, because whilst the tables are much easier to read and analyse, this sort of essay calls for a scientific essay long format. Also the use of bullet points to separate each statement. Grammar, spelling and punctuation all okay.
Level of analysis
The candidate assesses a variety of effects of exhausts on the human population and also provides a variety of ways in which each problem can be improved which is good to see. However, it would have been better to include some depth to the science and include some scientific equations, such as to explain why catalytic converters make combustion more efficient and reduce the affect on the general population. They do include some overall details and conclusion on the main use of catalytic converters at the end but a valid well defined conclusion on the methods and what they reduce would have been better to show greater consideration of the essay research.
Response to question
The response to the question is done adequately as the candidate considers a number of effects on the population and how to improve it, but the essay lacks real scientific depth behind it.
