Erikson proposed a useful framework for the development of identity consisting of eight stages, each with a psychosocial crisis that one must resolve before moving to the next stage (Gardiner, Kosmitzki 2005). He particularly emphasized the adolescence period, he believed that the primary task of this stage is establishing a sense of identity—a feeling of who one is and ones place in the larger social order (Crain 2005). Ishmael’s biography explains in great detail this process in establishing his identity, even in a world of utter chaos. As he critically analyzes his internal motives, thoughts, and emotions he offers rare insight into this process.
One might argue that before the rebels attacked Ishmael’s village, he was on the path of normal development. That is, he had successfully resolved each crisis that previous stages had offered. At the age of eight, Ishmael, his brother Junior, and his two friends Talloi and Mohamed started a rap and dance group (Beah p.6). They frequently listened and danced to American hip-hop and became immersed in the culture that it offered. Ishmael particularly enjoyed the lyrics, which he claimed were poetic and improved his English vocabulary (something that was encouraged in his village) (Beah p.6). According to Crain (2005) one forms their identity through identifications. That is, “we find those that appeal to us and strive to become like them” (p.288). This is seen by the way that Ishmael and his friends dressed. The aspired to be like those people whose music that were trying to imitate.
“In those days we wore baggy jeans, and underneath them we had soccer shorts and sweatpants for dancing. Under our long-sleeved shirts we had sleeveless undershirts, T-shirts, and soccer jerseys. We wore three pairs of socks that we pulled down and folded to make our crapes (sneakers) look puffy (Beah p.7)
It is evident from this example that Ishmael and his friends were on the path to developing their identities. Identities that were vastly different from what would be considered the “norm” in their country. Non-conformity is a healthy sign of development for children approaching adolescence.
This group of boys was typical in the sense of what one might find in any culture. They teased each other, they played games, competed with each other, but most importantly they identified with each other. The influence of peers throughout Ishmael’s story is of great significance. Erikson (1968) claimed that adolescence marks a shift from identifying with one’s parents and siblings to an emphasis in peer relations. While Ishmael and his friends’ journey through the forest in search for food and safety, this emphasis is highlighted. Gardiner & Kosmitzki (2005) claimed that through natural child development children learn that group cooperation is beneficial to personal and academic goals; Ishmael learned that only through group cooperation could he survive the horrors of his current world.
Both out of a necessity for survival and a need to be understood, Ishmael and his friends develop a “family” during their travels. They cooperate and talk about their plans or what they should do next. They hold each other’s hands, and comfort each other in times of distress. One instance in particular shows the concern that they had for one another. One of the boys, Saidu, fainted one night when the boys were hiding in the bushes from a potential threat—three people that are on the same path that they themselves were traveling. At first, the other boys in the group assumed that Saidu had died. They decided to carry Saidu to the next village and Kanie, with the help of the others, hoisted Saidu onto his back. On the way to the nearest village Saidu regains conscientiousness and claims that the three figures that they hid from were ghosts. The group shows great concern over Saidu, repeatedly asking him if he was alright and insisting that he rest (Beah pp. 83-84).
Ishmael identified himself as a “troublesome boy…always getting into fights at school and at the river (Beah p. 42). We can see from this self-proclamation that Ishmael had an idea of what he was and how he was viewed. Ishmael’s parents were divorced and lived in separate villages. Ishmael and his brother Junior lived with their father, and their father was constantly in between wives. Since the two boys did not have a mother at home they were labeled as the “misfits” of the community and often were the topic of discussion. Ishmael was aware of the gossip. Although formal learning was available to those that could afford schooling, it is evident that informal learning was a strong influence in the lives of the villagers (Gardiner, Kosmitzki 2005). Because Ishmael and his brother did not have a mother at home, members of the village would say, “those poor boys…they aren’t going to have any good completed training” (Beah 42).
During Ishmael’s search for safety, food, and shelter he is plagued by a sense of hopelessness. “Each day went by very slowly as I busied myself thinking about what other possibilities lay ahead. Was there an end to this madness, and was there any future for me beyond the bushes” (Beah 45)? Ishmael struggles to hang onto any memory of home that he can, but as time goes by and his situation intensifies, the positive memories of home begin to fade and Ishmael becomes suspicious of his own thoughts. Ishmael makes the decision to try with all his power not to think, because with each thought sadness always followed. He worried about his friends, his family, but most of all he worried about were his life was headed. Although Piaget had little to say about the biological forces affecting adolescence, it is easy to make the connection between Erikson’s theory and Piaget’s, specifically, on why adolescence might be an identity-searching time. As Ishmael is propelled into formal operational thinking, he is no longer limited to the here and now. He can now entertain limitless possibilities on the direction of his life and what will become of him. Inhelder & Piaget (1955) claimed that formal operational capacities might contribute to the self-questioning period of adolescence (p.298). While Ishmael struggles with this internal conflict, his primary concern is survival. As Ishmael put it: “to survive each passing day was my goal in life” (Beah p.69).
Throughout Ishmael biography he shows a connection to the sky, specifically to the moon. He frequently relates his current situation to that of the moon.
In some way my journey was like that of the moon…its brightness became dull as the nights passed. Some nights the sky wept stars that quickly floated and disappeared into the darkness before our wishes could meet them. Under these stars and sky I used to hear stories, but now it seemed as if it was the sky that was telling us a story as its stars fell, violently colliding with each other, The moon hid behind clouds to avoid seeing what was happening (Beah pp.70, 80).
This is just one example of Ishmael’s apparent connection with the moon. In the begging of the story, Ishmael’s grandmother tells him that he should strive to be like the moon; the moon reminds us to be good to one another. Perhaps the connection that Ishmael has with the sky and moon stems from his culture’s rich storytelling.
After escaping death numerous times, Ishmael and his friends stumble into the village of Yele. This village was occupied by Sierra Leone troops and seemed like a safe place. At first, they thought that they had finally found a haven away from the war. Apart from the presence of soldiers, the village reminded Ishmael of his own village. There was busy conversation, children playing soccer, and people busy at their daily tasks. There was no way of knowing that this would mark the second period in Ishmael’s journey, the period in which he would lose his innocence.
Yele soon comes under attack by rebel forces and Lieutenant Jabati makes the decision to recruit soldiers from the population there at Yele. Everyone was given the choice, or so the Lieutenant claimed it was a choice. Lieutenant Jabati uses every tactic that is available to him to recruit the group of people that are in his presence. He claims that the children must join out of necessity, out of fear, out of duty to rid the country of “a great evil” and the tactic that ultimately resonated with Ishmael revenge (Beah pp.106, 108). Erikson (1968) claimed, “the adolescent puts his trust in peers and leading, or misleading elders who will give scope to their aspirations” (p.129). Ishmael soon aspires to avenge his family and becomes a cold killer in the process. His elder at the time, Lieutenant Jabati, exploits this aspiration and encourages the idea of revenge.
The events that follow quickly change Ishmael forever. As he put it “our days were replaced with more soldiery things” (Beah p.121). For example, Ishmael is given a gun shortly after his recruitment. At first he is frighten by the object, but it isn’t long before the gun becomes his only source of comfort and he doesn’t feel complete without it. In the beginning of Ishmael’s story he keeps count for his brother and Talloi while they compete in a push-up competition (Beah p.9). These types of activities are soon replaced by how fast they could clean their guns. They used to congratulate each other for scoring a goal in a game of soccer by giving each other high fives. After their recruitment they give each other high-fives for a successful or brutal kill. Instead of discussing hip-hop music, their conversations turned to how good the drugs were and how brutal their killings had been (Beah p.128). It is not hard to see how Ishmael’s identity changed when he became a soldier.
Ishmael had found security within his squad, protection from the everyday threat of being killed. For him, it seemed that he had found some sense of direction.
…the forests that we slept in became my home. My squad was my family, my gun my provider and protector, and my rule was to kill or be killed. The extent of my thoughts didn’t go much beyond that…killing had become a daily activity…my childhood had gone by without my knowing (Beah p.126).
Ishmael had become a killer and part of a “brotherhood” as Lieutenant Jabati had claimed (Beah p.129). He identified with his new military family, and therefore, had accepted his new military identity. French psychologist, H. Tajfel (1981) would claim that Ishmael had established a social identity with the members of his squad. Ishmael was proud of the killer that he had become and the members of his group praised him for it (as cited in Gardiner & Kosmitzki, 2005, pp.146-147). He was even promoted to Junior Lieutenant by his squad leader; this was a title that Ishmael valued very much.
As customary in Ishmael’s village, everyone must be given a name during a name-giving ceremony. This ceremony was an elaborate celebration, with the entire village in attendance. The village imam would cite a few prayers from the Quran, rub some water on the infant’s head, and proclaim a name the infant would then be called. Singing and dancing would follow the proclamation and everyone in the village would partake in a great feast. Upon recruitment into the squad, Ishmael was given a new name: “Green Snake.” This name was given to Ishmael because of his military tactics, “…you blend with nature like a green snake, deceptive and deadly when you want to be,” the corporal claimed (Beah p.144). Ishmael was proud of his new name and was committed to living up to it everyday.
It seemed that Ishmael had found his niche, no matter how bloody it may have been. He had become comfortable with the daily activity of killing. Through daily routines and a constant supply of drugs, “killing had become as easy as drinking water… [my mind] had stopped making remorseful records…” (Beah p.122). Ishmael assumed this military identity for approximately two years. That is until UNICEF intervenes and takes the youngest members of the squad.
Ishmael is confused by this and feels abandoned by Lieutenant Jabati. Without explanation, Ishmael is given up to these strangers and taken away from the war. Ishmael quickly draws lines in between the soldiers from UNICEF and himself. Ishmael questions his situation, “why had the lieutenant decided to give us up to these civilians” (Beah pp.129-130). This is a theme through the fist six months of Ishmael’s rehabilitation. He had established what a soldier was, and in his mind the soldiers that were keeping him away from the war were “sissy-soldiers” or “civilians.” Erikson (1968) claimed that in hurry to establish some form of identity, the adolescent will “stereotype themselves, their ideals, and their enemies” (p.133).
As mentioned above, Ishmael and his childhood friends had identified with the artists in the hip-hop culture. They aspired to be like the artists that they tried to imitate. This is particularly seen in the way that they dressed. This same theme follows Ishmael into his military identity and then into the rehabilitation center. Ishmael and his friends do not respect anyone that does not “look” like a soldier. “…we do not want to answer any questions from a civilian…what kind of army person wears only civilian clothing” (Beah p.134)?
Ishmael and the group of child soldiers that he finds at the rehabilitation center hold on to their military identity and even fight to keep it. They were determined to get the message across to those in charge that they “were not children to be played with” (Beah p.135). They were resistant to any form of activity that involved what they considered to be non-militaristic behavior. They refused counseling, schooling, and would resort to fighting each other for no apparent reason in an attempt to get a sense of “normalcy” to their daily routines. The staff’s positive attitudes and the fact that they did not hold the boys accountable for their behaviors, or rather the boys did not get the reaction or recognition that they were looking for, made the boys angry. Perhaps this is because the staff did not identify the boys as killers as they themselves did. This is apparent in the staffs constant reminding that it was not their fault that they behaved as they did. These comments made Ishmael even angrier.
It seemed, at first that Ishmael was a lost cause, as he was reluctant to trust anyone and had no intention of being rehabilitated. That is until he met a nurse at the center, Esther. Ishmael had highly inflated expectations of those around him; he also had a highly exaggerated pride in his military identity. Violence and aggression was how he came to resolve conflict and get what he needed day-to-day. Essentially, Ishmael needed to be re-socialized if he was to be returned to society. Esther showed a patience that soon would wear down on these survival mechanisms that Ishmael had learned to rely on.
The turning point in Ishmael and Esther’s relationship was when she brought him a cassette player and some hip-hop music. This instantly allowed Ishmael to let down his guard, not completely, but enough for Esther to show him that she truly cared. One night Ishmael had a disturbing dream—something that was a regular occurrence for him since the war—he visited Esther and she recognized that something was bothering him. He told her that he had had a nightmare, and she asked if he would like to share it with her. It is during these types of interactions that Esther’s patience with Ishmael is seen, but it was this particular instance that Ishmael began to see it for himself. Just as the other staff members would constantly remind Ishmael that “none of these things are your fault,” so did Esther. Ishmael came to believe it this statement at this particular visit with Esther. “It was the genuine tone in Esther’s voice that made the phrase finally begin to sink into my mind and heart…she looked at me with the same inviting eyes and welcoming smile that said I was a child” (Beah p.165).
This is a major tuning point for Ishmael. He begins to feel guilt over the things he had done, and also experiences a sense of loss due to the war. Again, Esther is there to support Ishmael. The loss of family leaves Ishmael with the thought that there is nothing to live for, and the feeling that he was alone in this world. Esther offers to be his family, his sister, or “temporary sister” as Ishmael accepts (Beah p.167). This marks the third period in Ishmael’s journey and the beginning of his third identity.
Ishmael, even as a very young child, had always shown a fondness for Shakespeare. His father would praise him for reciting Shakespeare monologues in the village as a young boy. Lieutenant Jabati was also fond of Shakespeare and Ishmael felt a connection to him because of this. He would look forward to reciting Shakespeare with the lieutenant every chance he was given. This may have been an attempt by Ishmael to hold on to some remote memory from his childhood.
During the fifth month of Ishmael’s rehabilitation, Esther informs Ishmael that there is to be a talent show at the center and that he should perform one of his reggae songs for the competition. Ishmael insists that he will perform a Shakespeare monologue, but ends up doing both. In attendance at the talent show were representatives from UNICEF, the European Commission, and NGO. The representatives from these agencies were so impressed by Ishmael’s performance and progress; they ask him to be the spokesperson for the rehabilitation center.
Although Ishmael doesn’t think that he is the right person to be representing the center, he agrees and soon finds himself speaking at large gatherings about the importance of returning former child soldiers to society and the role that the centers play in this process, using himself as an example.
Sometime during the seventh month into Ishmael’s rehabilitation process, Leslie, a field-worker from the Children Associated with the War Organization (CAW), informed Ishmael that he had not been able to locate Ishmael’s family and that he would have to be placed with a foster family. Ishmael informed Leslie that he remembered his father mentioning that he had an uncle, Tommy that lived in Freetown. Leslies assures Ishmael that he will do his best to locate his uncle and encourages Ishmael to keep up the good work.
Leslie is successful at locating Ishmael’s uncle and brings him to the center to meet his nephew. Ishmael is hesitant at trusting a man that he had never met, as he still struggled to trust anyone. Tommy assures him that he is his family and that he will be treated as a son and part of his family. Ishmael is happy, but still skeptical and because “[he] still believed in the fragility of happiness” (Beah p.173). Tommy visits regularly over the next couple months and begins to earn Ishmael’s trust. Ishmael particularly enjoys the visits with his uncle because he is able to talk about his childhood before the war. Soon, Ishmael is repatriated and released into the care of his uncle.
Ishmael is introduced to his new family and soon finds himself regularly sneaking out to dances with his cousin Allie. Ishmael meets a girl, Zainab, at one of these dances and begins to date her. This relationship lasts for about three weeks, when Ishmael breaks in off due to Zainab wanting to know more about him. Gardiner & Kosmitzki (2005) claimed that each stage in Erikson’s theory is “accompanied by a psychosocial crisis requiring resolution if one is to move successfully from one stage to the next” (p.35). Ishmael had not successfully negotiated his place in the world at this point; therefore the stage of intimacy vs. isolation was not something that could be realized at this point in Ishmael’s development. As soon as Zainab inquired about “who” Ishmael was, he ended the relationship. This question is probably something that Ishmael did not have an answer for.
Not long after Ishmael is returned to society, he is asked to go to New York City and speak at a conference on the behalf of child soldiers in Sierra Leone and what could be done about the situation. Ishmael is granted an interview with CAW and is chosen to fly to New York City. Most of what Ishmael had thought about New York City came from rap videos that he and his friends watched as young children. New York was portrayed as a city of violence and a place where people got away with all kinds of crude behavior. Ishmael was not ready to be in such a place because it reminded him of what he had just escaped from.
When Ishmael arrived in New York City, Dr. Tamba, his escort, informed him that it was “winter” in New York. Ishmael was familiar with the word “winter” from the writings of Shakespeare, but he did not understand what it meant. He had the same reaction to the word “snowfall” which he had never heard before, but had seen movies about Christmas and was familiar with scene of snow falling. He thought that because it was snowing everyday that it must Christmas everyday in New York. Gardiner & Kosmitzki (2005) introduce the concept of linguistic relativity in their book Lives Across Cultures: Cross-Culture Human Development, the idea that language helps shape the way we think. Ishmael had never experienced snow and therefore, has no concept of the word “snowfall,” by using the idea of Christmas he assimilates this new experience to help him understand what he is hears others saying and what he is seeing for himself.
On the last day of the conference, Ishmael is given the opportunity to speak on the behalf of child soldiers in Sierra Leone. He had been given a prepared speech, but decided to speak from the heart instead. The speech that Ishmael gives is perhaps the best example of the new identity that he had established since his rehabilitation.
I am from Sierra Leone, and the problem that is affecting us children is the war that forces us to run away from our homes, lose our families, and aimlessly roam the forest…we get involved in the conflict as soldiers…all of this because of starvation, the loss of our families, and the need to feel safe and be a part of something when all else has broken down…I wanted to avenge the deaths of my family…and the only way to do that was to be part of the army…I have been rehabilitated now, so don’t be afraid of me. I am not a soldier anymore; I am a child…I joined the army to avenge the deaths of my family and to survive, but I’ve come to learn that if I am going to take revenge, in that process I will kill another person whose family will want revenge; then revenge and revenge and revenge will never come to an end (Beah p.199)
It is clear to see the difference in the military identity that Ishmael had assumed during the war and the identity that is present in the speech above.
Ishmael returns to Sierra Leone after the conference, starts secondary school, and attempts to regain some of his childhood that was lost during the war. Ishmael was determined to not live in the past so that he could be fully present in his new life. Unlike before, when he was afraid of his own thoughts and did not want to think about where his life was going, he enjoyed thinking about the future because he was confident that his future could not be any worse than his past had been.
Ishmael had been rehabilitated, but the war was still very much a reality. The conflict soon made its way to Freetown and gunshots would break the silence of the night, silence that Ishmael had come to enjoy. Ishmael’s uncle becomes sick and death soon follows. The army, which now consisted of soldiers from the Sierra Leone government and the rebel forces, were shooting people in the streets of Freetown. Ishmael was faced with a decision, either find his way to New York, or return to the horrors of being a child soldier. A woman, Laura, had befriended Ishmael while he was in New York and assured him that he could stay with her if he could make it out of Sierra Leone.
Ishmael packed a bag, gathered the little money that he had saved, and headed out of the country. He barely made it out of Sierra Leone, but managed to do so. Ishmael had escaped the possibility of becoming a soldier again, and this gave him comfort. Ishmael’s biography ends here, but his journey does not.
Ishmael is passionately involved in many human rights organizations, advocating for children that share his story. Ishmael used to love hearing about the history of Ethiopia from Leslie during his many visits to the rehabilitation center. He especially enjoyed the story of the meeting of King Solomon and Queen of Sheba. He related to the long distances that they had traveled and their determination to reach their goals. “I wished that my journey had been as meaningful and as full of merriment as theirs” (Beah p.164). While Ishmael’s journey may not have been as full of merriment as King Solomon and Queen of Sheba’s journey, his journey was just as meaningful. He is a model of true resilience in the face of extreme adversity.
References
Beah, I. (2007). A long way gone: Memoirs of a boy soldier. New York: Sarah Crichton Books.
Crain, W. (2005). Theories of development: Concepts and applications. New Jersey: Pearson Education, Inc.
Erikson, E. H. (1968). Identity, youth, and crisis. New York: W.W. Norton and Company, Inc.
Gardiner, H. K. & Kosmitzki, C. (2005). Lives across cultures: Cross-cultural human development. Boston: Pearson Education, Inc.
Inhelder, B. & Piaget, J. (1955). The growth of logical thinking from childhood to adolescence. New York: Basic Books.
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tsain1 (student)
