Home office 2000
However, there are many factors that conflict with this conventional idea of families. The family also generates fear, violence and lack of either supervision or Maslow’s Hierarchy of primary needs (love, care, shelter and warmth). An American charity () suggest growing up is not always an easy time for children and teens- many have behavioural, social or learning problems, either at home, at schools or within their communities.
John Bowlby states a child’s strong attachment to its mother was necessary for normal, healthy development… he states also that the relation formed with mother will be vital for the child to be able to determine the nature of the relationship. He states that lack of maternal affection will lead to the liable of others e.g. delinquency.
The Government’s interest in the family policy is primarily an interest in ensuring that the next generation gets the best possible start in life. Or so they say?
The divorce rate has raised sharply, for example one in three marriages ends in divorce in the UK and that is the highest divorce rate anywhere in Europe (The National Association of Family Medication and Conciliation Services 1993). There are more children growing up in single-parent households, and there is more child poverty; over 1500 children are affected by divorce of their parents each year and 60% of these children are under 11 year olds and 25% are less than 5 year olds (The National Association of Family Medication and Conciliation Services 1993).
‘Parental divorce seems to benefit children in certain ways if it removes them from a discordant parental household.’
…………………………………2preslex.org/GRANACH3.HTM
Divorce does not mean children have to choose between parents. The vast majority of children of divorce will be able to offer examples of some positive outcomes (Black, K. N. 1982).
It is estimated that 160,000 children experience divorce each year. In the last thirty years there has been an increase of more than 400% in the numbers of decree absolutes in England and Wales. By the twenty-first century 25% of children will have divorced parents and 50% of children will not grow up in what is described as a “traditional” family (Social Trends 1993).
There are some ethnic differences in divorce rate. Thirty-eight per cent of white children experience parental divorce before their sixteen birthdays, and almost 74% of African-American children encounter their parents’ separation or divorce by the same age (www.emporia.edu/tec/600d-pa4.htm).
Divorce is rated as one of the most stressful life events by both parents and children (Drapeau, Samson & Saint-Jacques 1999; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999). Divorce and life in single parents’ family are often accompanied by an increase in stressful life events and disruptions in family functioning that put children at risk for developing problems in adjustment (Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999). Children from divorced families, in contrast to those form never-divorced families, have academic problems; exhibit externalising disorders such as antisocial, aggressive, noncompliant behaviour (Hetherington, Bridges & Insabella 1998; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999). They also show lack of self-regulation, low social responsibility, diminished cognitive agency and achievement (Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999). Adolescents from divorced families are more likely to drop out of school, be unemployed and on welfare, and to have fewer financial resources (Hetherington Briges & Insabella 1998; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999). However there only seems to be a small difference between groups, the relation between single parenting and a child’s academic achievement is complex. Hetherington et al. (1983) suggested the following: the need for single parents to rely on their children for assistance with household and child-care tasks and routines of daily living may result in less time available for children to attend to achievement-related tasks. This, in turn, may result in lower grades and less positive evaluations by teachers and school personnel (Stevenson, R. M. & black, N. K. How divorce affects offspring pg. 271).
Given the obtainable data regarding this issue, there cannot be a conclusion that parental divorce causes; with the respect to intellectual ability or school performance having a directly negative effect. So what evidence is there to show children of divorce families lack higher achievements levels than their counterparts to be know; there are such contributing factors as social class, parental conflict, or lack of supervision and income.
As family roles, relationships, and circumstances changes as a result of parental divorce, children often show internalising disorders such as depressive symptoms and anxiety, have lower self-esteem and less psychological well-being (Hetherington, Briges & Insabella 1998; Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan 1999; O’Connor 1999; Pett, Turner, Vaughan-Cole & Wampold 1999).
O’Connor found from his retrospective research on parental divorce and adjustment in adulthood that individuals who experienced a parental divorce were more likely to exhibit depression compared with those who did not experience a parental divorce. Many children experience a lot of anger towards the change in their family life whereas they want to hate their parents but love them at the same time.
‘My mother groan’d! My father wept. Into the dangerous world I leapt: Helpless, naked, piping loud: Like a fiend hid a cloud.’
Blake, W.: Infant sorrow, from Songs of Innocence and Experience pg. 145
In considering this powerful emotion-anger-looking at it as a response of circumstances, as well as being an essential stage in the mourning process (Parkes 1972; Bowlby 1973; Jewett 1984).
‘Who is it that can tell me who I am?’
William Shakespeare: King Lear pg. 77
With regards to King Lear’s question parents and children going through divorce, feel just like that! The adult is contemplating the loss of a partner, a marriage, a social status and powerful feelings come into play- rage, despair, fear, murderous anger- as well as a sense of failure, shame and intense rejection. Some parents experience a child-like vulnerability in the face of what feels like an onslaught on every level.
‘…What about the father? What about the child? Well what about ME? …’
A mother’s feeling on divorce Kroll, B. (1994) Children, divorce and loss pg.77
For the child changes in parents’ behaviour can be confusing, frightening and worrying. Grown-ups, after all, are supposed to have a grip on things, to know what they are doing and to behave in a certain way- otherwise what is the point in having them in the first place? (Kroll, B.1994)
Some children, by virtue of their position, are more likely to adopt a mature veneer, as a matter of course; although it also suggests that the picture is inevitably over simplified and are considerably more complex (Dunn 1990). When children take on the responsibility of adulthood too soon, whereas they feel they have to take on the grown-up behaviour expected of them when going through a divorce. Wallerstein and Kelly (1980) found that such children got be placed into two categories- those they describe as “Empathetic” and those who have become victims of what they call “Role reversal”. In the former category, they argue that the children gained something valuable from being able to support and care for a parent during a difficult time, provided it was only for a limited period. In the latter category, however, it seemed clear that assuming responsibility for a parent over a period of time could have serious consequences in later life, where children’s own needs had been unmet due to the overwhelming nature of those of the parent, and the fact that the child had not been able to be freed from the burden they represented – a conclusion that seemed to be borne out, at least in part, by follow-up studies (Wallerstein 1989).
Baxa J. D and Shaw S. J. stresses that children from divorced families have problems in their relationships with parents, siblings, peers and teachers and are more likely to have problems forming and maintaining other stable relationships including martial relationships. Even in young adulthood, long after divorce many have occurred, problems in the adjustment of offspring of divorced parents can be seen in their quality of close personal relationships. In comparison with young adults from non divorced families, young adults from divorced families exhibit more reciprocated, escalating, negative exchanges, including denial, belligerence, criticism, and contempt, and less effective problems solving during their martial interactions. This pattern is probably related to the intergeneration transmission of divorce, which is reported to be 70% higher in the first five years of marriage for adult women from divorced families than those whose parents have remained married.
‘25% of children in Britain will experience at least one parental divorce by the time they are sixteen.’
The Family and Divorce Centre 1994 (www.argonet.co.uk/education/chawkins/chris/div.html)
More than 150,000 children a year are put through the distress and turmoil caused by their parents divorce. Over 76,000 children are under 5 years old. The incidence of divorce has risen over the last 10 years by 2% and looks to be still rising (The Family and Divorce Centre 1994 Chris Hawkins).
Experts are influenced by assumptions implicit in society as well as by the schematic thinking prevalent in their discipline. Ferri (1976) suggests that the effects attributed to one-parent family are based less on evidence than on the assumption that one parent cannot adequately perform a role that society allocates to two.
The arguments put forward in this essay examine whether divorce has a necessary negative affect on children. There exists disagreements case of divorce is very different regarding how the situation was handled. Just look at how society plays a very important role in how children from divorced families are perceived and there it is – why there are so many implications that divorce has a necessary negative affect on children. Which in many cases it hasn’t.