The buzz of chat, laughter and voices of all kinds run through my head all day, everyday. I hear arguments, children crying, parents shouting, teenagers swearing, what is the world coming to? Blanking all of the bad things, I also hear laughter, young couples sweet talking each other, what have I done wrong to not deserve what they have got? Chinese, French, German, Spanish, Greek, at least five foreign speaking people pass me each day. The world is changing bit by bit each day, and not every change is good!
The thing I miss most is the mouth-watering taste of roast dinner smothered in thick gravy (when I was at home that was)! I cant believe that I ever complained about the army dinners, what I would give to have one now! The only thing that I ever get a taste of is a cold, sour, day old coffee which has started to mould at the top! Maybe after a good day of dosing, if the punters are feeling generous I will have enough money to buy a small bottle of malt whisky, and before you even start to think that I’m a wino, I’m not, okay? I only drink the stuff to keep me warm inside and to fill up my empty, swollen stomach!
The more I smell delicious coffee and burgers, from the burger hut near by, the more I long for a decent meal and something warm to fill me up. The sweet smell of cigarette smoke occasionally wafts past me and occasionally I am so tempted to pick up the remains of a cigarette that has just been thrown on the ground just to clear the taste of unwashed teeth and sticky taste in my mouth!
I feel the cold, the hunger, the pain twenty-four, seven! Every day I am prepared for the hurt that is thrown at me. I have no family, no friends, and no one to love me and there is no one for me to love back. If you’ve ever felt this you can understand what I am talking about. I used to cry for hours on end until I realised that no one is ever going to comfort me from the tears that I am barricaded with, no one would even notice if I disappeared. Sometimes I wonder what is the point in me living. There isn’t one, I lead a meaningless, pathetic life and there is no meaning to my existence! I remember in my teen years I used to sit around into the late hours of the night, in what I used to think was freezing cold conditions. I used to sit there with at least twelve layers of clothing on and still be cold, now I sit through this every minute of the day in what you could only just call one layer of clothing (so thin, damp and worn away)!
If only I could make a difference to the world if I could just have ten minutes to talk to the world and make everyone listen. Nobody knows half the troubles. England is a pretty small yet wealthy country, but why then are there over 169,000 homeless people and over 80,000 of those homeless people are in London. If you are a parent imagine your sixteen-year-old son or daughter out at night trying to sleep in a shop doorway almost dying from hunger, just over one stupid row! One in nine sixteen-year-olds run away, this could be your child, having nothing to eat and nowhere to sleep, but you can’t get hold of them and may never see them again! Fair enough some people are out on the street through their own fault, but why blame them, not everyone you see is a cheap, dirty, begging wino! Give them a second chance. I am speaking through first hand experience; I am most probably going to live through the rest of my days on the street. Why can’t you help, I’m not asking you to give all your money or your home up, even if your contribution is buying an issue of the ‘Big Issue’ all of the money from that goes to help people in my situation. We don’t need your sympathy we need your help! If only I could make the world listen!
