But then, the strangest thing happened, I had another visitor. It was the old swamper. At least it was someone who has somewhat of a brain. Said to me that it must be nice to have the whole room to myself. If only he would understand what I prefer to have; I’d rather be in a room cramped with 20 people than facing 4 white walls every evening! Candy went on to say that he was part of Lennie and George’s rambled about how close they are to actually succeeding, like it was really going to happen. I couldn’t believe the big guy was speaking the truth all along! I can’t stop myself from thinking, if these two people can talk to me like I’m somebody, living with them on their ranch my twist my fate, I will no longer be discriminated! Suddenly, the fact that my future could change into something better, something to look forward to, really made me excited. Images of what I can accomplish flushed into my mind, The thought of having to deal with less of what I deal with now is just exhilarating! When Candy talked about having their own land and living without the worry of losing a place to live, food to eat, and actually owning property, my heart soared, that would really be a great idea, my life really could change! I can’t stop thinking about it, how Lennie and George are so close to achieving their goal, mine might be possible too! I could have if I had my own land, I might earn more than what I earn now, even raise a family, I could be a dad and … so much possibilities.
Curley’s wife appeared at my front door, the one that has tons of makeup on her face, which brought us three men to shock, I don’t remember the last time this room was so crowded! What trouble does she want now? With her here, I could imagine the worst happening, us three being sacked from our jobs, is that what she wants nowI think that in one way, me and Curley’s wife have in common is having no one to communicate with. But she really pissed me off when she used her position in the ranch to threaten my job, that was not what I would do if I wanted to get along with someone or find someone to talk to. It was her fault for not believing that Curley did not get his hand stuck into the machine, what have I done to deserve those words that came out from her mouth? Who she call a nigger? That mean bitch that had no friends, she forgot that she was in my room, what she doing coming in so late to a man’s room, wanting to get us all into trouble? Why can’t she just mind her own business and leave us all to our peace?
But I’m glad she reminded me, I almost forgot my idenity, who I am as a black, how could I have even bared the thought of getting a life outside? I totally forgot about myself and how these white people treat me, how could I live with them, we are from different worlds, we cannot live together in peace, it will never happen. Good thing I told Lennie that I have changed my mind to being part of their land, god knows what might happen if I really went to start a new life with them! Tonight was such a strange night, how could everyone be suddenly off guard and talked to me like I was somebody to them, I haven’t had company for a very long time and I’ve really missed it a lot. I really want someone to talk to ,to be able to listen to me talk, I really believe that being alone for such a long time would really drive me crazy somehow. The yearning I have for a companion is driving me close to being mad! But I will not forget about my dignity and who I am as a black person.
