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Gone to Soon.

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Gone to Soon

I can’t think, I can’t speak, I’m numb inside, there is no beginning or end just this intolerable anger, and never-ending pain! I can’t take this any more, if he doesn’t stop; I’m going to have to hit him. There will be no question in the matter of what will happen to me, but just that one instant when nothing will matter anymore, because I will have got even. However, what he will do to me will be unimaginable!

I’m 15, and have been picked on every year that I have been here at Saddlebunch Grammar School. Everyday I wake up and just imagine the unbearable torture he is going to put me through for another unliveable day. My parents don’t know, there not at home long enough to see me, or the bruises he gives me. Once he had a metal bar that wrapped around his fingers, and when he punched me in the jaw, that was more than I could handle.

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I’ve learnt to take it now though, just don’t flinch, because it will make it worse, he says you’re a baby, and hits you even harder. You just have to block out the pain, imagine he’s not hitting you, and play dead when he looks as if he’s tiring. He’s not the only one though, to start with, I didn’t lie down and let him win, and when he would tire, he would ‘let his boy’s finish me off’.

I just don’t think I can take any more of this, I want to let go and just hit him, but the pain is too much. Ouch, my lip’s bleeding now, and I’ll probably have a black eye to go with that tomorrow morning. The one good thing about this is that I get to miss class I have history next. My history teacher likes me, he knows what is happening, and lets me go to the nurse when I’m in his lessons.

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 Oh no! He hits me harder than he ever has before. I go black. I expect to wake up in the nurse’s office again, but I don’t. If not the nurse’s office then the hospital, but I don’t. I’m only 15 this can’t happen to me. I can hear voices around me I can hear them saying stuff. Now I can see them, there’s a man in a white cloak explaining something to a sobbing woman. That’s my mum! I try to scream out to tell her that I’m here but I can’t. He’s saying something about bleeding into the skull, and there was nothing they could do. He’s apologising. My mum rushes over to me and hugs me. I try to hug her back and comfort her, but I can’t. She whispers something in my ear; I only hear a few words. “ You’re my precious, I should have watched over you, I can’t now because you’re gone”.

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