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Agony Aunt Letters

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Gary Thompson Wednesday 6th February 2008 Agony Aunt Letter George's Agony Aunt Letter Dear Katy Kindheart, I'm just a lonely and frustrated barley bucker with a lot of problems. My name's George and I'm a migrant ranch hand going from place to place in California with nothing to look forward to. I've been on the move now for nigh on five years with next to nothing to my name. My problem is made worse because I've got this dumb ass to after alla time. I'll just call this son-of-a-bitch Chuck cos I would hate to get this guy into real trouble but Chuck ain't got no other relatives. He can't be trusted on his own for a few minutes on account of his killing little furry animals. You see, this crazy bastard likes the feel of soft fur and once he feels it he can't let go and gets all mixed up. For example, he'll be squeezing a mouse and it will bite him so he pinches its head and squashes it flat as a pancake. I've bashed him on the head with a fence picket to make him stop but he's so goddamn strong and he has no self control. ...read more.


I got a dream of getting' my own place and eatin' what comes out of the ground but I don't have the confidence to visit a real estate and choose somewhere. Ya see, I got some stake saved up and I bet I could do her if I really wanted, but them other guys won't help me and they just laugh at me. My confidence has been totally destroyed. I want your words of wisdom, Katy!! Please help me! Yours truly, A crippled ol' swamper Curley's Wife's Agony Aunt Letter Dear Katy Kindheart, I'm just a worthless piece of property. My real name's Beatrice, stuck on this ranch with a bunch of fellas. There's this one guy, his names Robert but he has been living his life with this nickname Curley so no-one else knows his real name except me and his pops, the guy in charge of this whole place. You see, Curley's my husband but he uses me like one of his "vintage" hats, mostly on for show and never used the way it should. Even though I'm the only woman dumb and desperate enough to stay with this crazy bastard, he acts like he can get any girl he can think of. ...read more.


He hardly ever talks but when I can get him to speak it's the most communication I've ever had between anyone except Curley and his Pops. I hope that maybe we could spend a little more time together but he's either working or dragging his heels behind this scrawny little bastard. He never leaves his side but I will get him on his own some day and explain to him everything about me just for the hell of it. It's not his fault that he can't explore on his own, it's just the little guy acts like his father and tells him to leave everything alone or he'll get in trouble. I also got a bastard breathing down my neck, watching my every step, but I will get him on his own with no one to interrupt us. Curley better not find out about my plan for my sake 'cause he just gets mad about nothing but if he sniffed out a chance that I was flirting with other men behind his back then I would either have to take the beating of my life or run away and have nowhere else to go. Please help me survive this terrible horror of a life. Yours, A lonely, mistreated victim of abuse. ...read more.

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