July 4th
Dear Diary
Independence day my … foot.. We’re basically in the middle of nowhere and josh and I gotta start school in like! 3 days! Damn.. I wish I was back at home with Ali Dylan…. We’ve been here for like 4 days and can’t find a bluddy church anywhere. The Chinese people here all come up and stare at my straw blonde hair as it’s a sign of the devil or something. The whispers I hear. I don’t know whether its just me, or not, but more people seem to whisper more when I wear my silver cross around my neck.
July 9th
Well, school officially SUCKS. Oh yeah
Dear Diary
I’m at the international school, which is only about 50 miles away from this dump we’re living in. Actually it’s pretty nice.. it’s like 2 stories n its bigger than what we lived in before which is cool. Anyways I’m having a hard time adjusting to the new school, cuz like everyone knows each other and are already friends. I guess I kinda got accepted into a group. I think. I’m not sure… most of the people here are English or American, and I’m getting made fun of because I speak funny.
I miss home so much. The guys here are pretty nice, but nothing compared to Dylan. Obviously. Anyways, I made a new kewl friend called Amy, whose English. She’s really nice and into all the same stuff as me. I didn’t believe it. When I first thought about moving to china I didn’t expect people to be listening to punk music and watching Friends. Surprisingly, life was pretty normal.
I guess school isn’t so bad now I think about it again, but in comparison it’s nothing. I wanna go home n hang out with my friends and watch movies. We’re still trying to find a church. Whenever we ask anyone they look at us really funny and go… oh.. I don’t know.. which is really weird. At least we brought our bibles. Oh I’m so tired it’s like 12:22am and I can’t sleep. Oh well… night night.
July 10th
Dear Diary,
The weirdest thing happened to me today. We were in Religious Education when the teacher asked me what religion I belonged to. I told her I was a devout Christian and she looked at me in like a way.. I don’t know mixed of shock and horror. Later I asked Amy what was up with that look and she told me that the teacher just didn’t like Christians and that nothing was wrong. When I came home I told Josh about it and he said he was being bullied because he was a Christian and his silver necklace of a cross was ripped from his neck and stomped on by the other boys. I don’t get it. Mum is out shopping and Dad is at work and I don’t know what to do. Will I get bullied? I’m only 14! And josh is like 16 and he’s getting bullied!! I’m scared now. I want my computer and I wanna go online and talk to everyone and listen to my music on napster to assure me things are alright.
July 10th ( later )
Dear Diary,
Dad’s being picked on at work, his new boss Mr. Wong doesn’t seem to like him much, and he hasn’t seemed to of made any friends or anything. Neither has mum. She spoke to our neighbors but she said the moment she mentioned she was Christian they seemed to want nothing to do with her. What’s wrong with being a Christian!
Awe I miss St. Kilda so much.. so much I even miss school! Oh my gosh what is wrong with me!
July 11th
Dear Diary,
Today I talked to Amy about being a Christian and after ages of badgering her she told me that because Christians were led from overseas by foreigners, the government doesn’t like us, and that we had faulty thinking, because we weren’t communists. I think Dads having a real hard time at work because he’s snapping at us and shouting at us when we do little things wrong. He’s normally so nice I don’t think I’ve ever heard dad shout at us before this! At least Amy’s still friends with me. The boys’ at school have started to pick on me calling me names. It’s not much, but it hurts. I’m gonna go n talk to mum n josh now.. cya
July 12th
Dear Diary
Mum said Dad’s having a really really bad time at work. She said that his boss is always screaming at him and shouting at him for little things and saying why can’t he work harder! We’ve only been here for 12 days please God let the nightmare end.
July 15th
Dear Diary,
Personally, I think Dad’s gonna get fired.. shit! We have like no money since we spent it all to move here. Damn. This is so unfair picking on people because of what they choose to believe in. School sucks. I’m being picked on more and Josh is actually coming home with bruises. God help us. Please. I don’t want Dad to get fired. How will we live? We’ll have no money or anything!
bye
July 26th
Dear Diary,
I cannot believe this is happening to me. The other night, we were all sitting around the table before dinner praying when the door was crashed in. A man dressed in black held up a shiny metal gun and pointed it at my father and calmly said,
“ We have reason to believe you have Bibles in your possession and we also have reason to believe you are reading them. You are being placed under arrest by the Chinese law.”
How corny! And it was in a Chinese American accent, like the man had watched too many American cop shows on telly.
“ All of you are to come to the police station with me,” the cop said. “ Do not worry, the worst is a death sentence.
That’s when I heard my mother scream something. I didn’t know at the time what she said, but I started running. I ran up the stairs and heard footsteps close behind. I ran though the hallway and ran into my room and slammed the door shut on the person behind me when I heard a male voice shout,
“ BRITTY open the damn door it’s josh hurry the f*** up!”
I quickly opened the door and let him in. We heard footsteps a few seconds after that, and I heard a male voice whisper something in Chinese. Then and there I knew it was the cops.
I was so scared, but I don’t know I felt a powerful thing go though me. I jumped to the window. There was a fire escape ladder right outside it. Jackpot. We lowered it carefully, and climbed down quickly and started running. We ran towards the main road, and cars were going by real quick.
“ Quick,” Josh shouted, “ Jump in the back of this truck Britts!”
The truck had stopped at the traffic lights, which was useful so we could climb in. We got in the back. There was all this hay everywhere. We just sat there, amazed at how well we had done to get away, but also scared of what happened to mum and dad.
I guess gradually we fell asleep.. it was quite comfy actually. Before I drifted off I glanced at my watch.. it was only 8:16pm. I didn’t know where we were when we woke up, but it was sunny, and the truck was still moving. I glanced at my watch again.. It was 6:13am.. I had been asleep in a moving truck for 10 hours! I poked a very comfy looking sleeping Josh and I woke him up and explained that we were in the middle of NOWHERE in a truck full of hay. Seemed like the only response he could offer was… shiiiiiiiit….
Anyways we got out when we came to the next city. It was called Shan Tou. We started off in like somewhere north west of china and now we’re like as south east as you could get in china! Thank God for cargo pants, otherwise I wouldn’t have my diary my wallet, my phone and my md with me. I checked the display on my phone. It read 93 missed calls. I swore. I had left my phone on silent by accident so I hadn’t heard it.
I turned it back normal so I could hear it the next time it rang. Almost immediately, as if on cue, the phone rang. I picked up. It was mum. She had escaped when Josh and I did. She said she was staying somewhere in like zhu ha or qi ha or something. I don’t know. The only thing I did know was that my phone was running out of batteries. I quickly said that we were in some place called Shan Tou and she had to come and help us!
After buying some food, me and josh looked around for a place to stay.. anything really that we could sleep in. We searched about 12 buildings before we found one with an empty apartment and a unlocked door.
We sat around just I don’t know.. just sitting there re tracking what happened in the last 24 hours.
I don’t know, but I think I fell asleep, and when I woke up I was somewhere else lying on a bed with a warm quilt over me. I got up and started having a panic attack. It was the 22nd. I had been asleep for.. 2 days! How! I couldn’t possibly sleep that long! I opened the door not really knowing what would happen to me next. I was at the end of a long narrow corridor. I wondered if mother had come and saved us, I really, now I can’t remember what I thought but many crazy thoughts were hitting me all at once. I ran down the corridor to find a big open room, with a man sitting at a table drinking Chinese tea, and smoking a long pipe thing, and I was sure he wasn’t smoking tobacco. I think it was Opium.
The man told me his name was Mr. Chan, and that he was going to take care of me for a couple of days.
I didn’t understand how I ended up here or anything.
A wave of sorrow went though his face.
He said,
“ I don’t know a light way to drop it on you, Brittany, but you’re brother is dead. A couple of nights ago he met up with some dealers and they sold him some cocaine, and he must of taken an overdose or something.. One of my men overheard him speaking on the phone earlier, before he bought the coke. He was speaking to your father, I believe, who is being held in prison for being a Christian. “
I collapsed. I literally collapsed. My knees went and I found myself on the floor crying. Crying for josh. I don’t know how long I was on the floor for, but I know it was for a long time. Talk about a bad day. I was lying on a couch when some other man comes up to me and hands me a Chinese newspaper. On the cover there was a picture of a blonde lady, dead hanging from a ceiling fan. It was my mother. Like my life wasn’t bad enough.
I couldn’t believe it. My brother and my mother.. both.. dead. I couldn’t believe it this couldn’t be happening to me! It couldn’t this was me! My life!
I’ve stayed on this cough since Tuesday. It’s Friday now. I’ve only moved off the couch to go to the bathroom. I don’t know what to do.
July 26th
Dear Diary,
This is the last entry I’m writing. Ever. I’ve decided to kill myself. I don’t know how and I’m not going to tell you how. I hope one day someone will find this, and reads it and I hope that this will change the Chinese law. Though I doubt it. I can’t wait. I hope I go to heaven so I can meet mum and josh.
If anybody ever reads this, Alex, Dylan, You guys are the bestest friends in the world and I’m sorry it’s had to come to this. I love you both.
