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Don't get me started on smoking! My one wish is that the people I know who smoke would listen to my advice, but it seems like the drug nicotine has affected their eyes and dulled their senses

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Introduction

Don't Get Me Started On Smoking! It's one of those depressing Mondays when you're feeling so reluctant to go to school. Don't forget, it's seven in the morning and all you want to do is stay at home in your warm cosy inviting bed to sleep, you wish! No, this is reality were talking about. Not anything can be superior as that. This is how it really works; you're walking to school in the grey gloomy morning having to put up with the horrific acrid smell which burns the back of your throat because self-centred people these days can't consider the cluster of kids who have to walk past their shop every day. ...read more.

Middle

Just the mere thought of it, disgusts and appals me. Has nobody witnessed a person dying in hospital, it is not a pleasant site to see. Seeing them when they were perfectly healthy and after that, they are transformed into skin and bone, ravaged with pain. Having to take morphine several times each day to ease pain they are going through. To look into their eyes sunk into their head. Is that the situation you want to be in? If you continue smoking, that could be your fate. I have to say it is quite a sickening thought having a partner who smokes - to imagine all the muck going inside their body. ...read more.

Conclusion

I certainly wouldn't want to be a part of that. Would you? It is never too late to stop smoking to greatly benefit your health. For example, if you stop smoking in middle age, before having cancer or some other serious disease, you avoid most of the increased risk of death due to smoking. Every cigarette is doing you damage... My one wish is that the people I know who smoke would listen to my advice, but it seems like the drug nicotine has affected their eyes and dulled their senses. Regardless of the fact that nicotine is a very addictive substance in cigarettes', at the end of the day, it's down to you to stop. ...read more.

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Here's what a teacher thought of this essay

3 star(s)

The "stop smoking" message is strongly put across here, with appropriate language and emotive images. Good arguments are made for stopping, including pulling at the strings of the guilt arising from making others suffer. Rhetorical questions are used to great effect. Paragraph construction is well-controlled and so is sentence construction to an extent. There are some poorly-constructed forms; these are mostly the kind of informal structures we may use in conversation: "To look into their eyes sunk into their head." but which are not appropriate in a discursive essay.

3 stars

Marked by teacher Jeff Taylor 20/05/2013

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