I got up as soon as my Mum left and watched T.V. in a deathly silence. My sisters were chattering away like newly born birds, unware of the news I knew was coming. I was listening to the radio while making the breakfast, Boyzone's "No Matter What" came on, at exactly nine - thirty. I listened to the words and couldn't take it anymore. I had to know.
Once my sisters and I were dressed, we hoovered, dusted and even cleaned the birds' cage! I was trying my hardest to keep a smile on my face, for the sake of my sisters. Suddenly, the phone rang. It was strange for anybody to phone in the early hours of ten thirty, during a holiday.
My sisters wide mouth and glazed eyes confirmed what I had believed from the start of the day. Gran was dead. My sister hung up the phone, and was literally jumping up and down and running around the kitchen crying like a puppy who had lost its bone. I just simply switched off the hoover and went to my room. I cried into my pillow for at least twenty minutes. Once I was finished, I wandered in a zombie like trance to the shop for my lunch. I noticed that it had started to rain. Earlier on, the sun was splitting the trees.
"Maybe the weather knows how I'm feeling," I thought to myself, sadly.
When I arrived back at the house, I couldn't face eating the tempting packet of crisps I had just purchased. I felt empty. Empty and sick. I felt as though the whole contents of my body had been mixed through a blender. I was so confused.
I lay quietly, on my own, watching T.V. I remembered the last time I saw her. She was lying in a hospital bed, being given a dose of morphine to stop the pain. I was just leaving and I didn't even get to say goodbye to her.
I heard the door slam. My Mum had arrived home. She entered the room. She looked so tired. Her hair was usually bouncy and shiny. Now it was flat and dull. Her face looked dark and tear stained and her hands were shaking. It was a shock to see my Mum crying, I had never seen her like this before. I couldn't speak. My voice was caught on something. She just came over, sat on the bed beside me and burst out crying. I was so stunned to see my Mum crying, that I burst out crying as well.
She bent down and put her arms around me. She wanted me to comfort her. I held her in my arms for a few seconds, before she pulled away.
My youngest sister entered the room. My Mum stood up and gave her a cuddle.
"Gran is in heaven now"
she sniffed, and turned and walked out of the room.
My Dad arrived home early. I was sitting in my usual seat by the window, huddled up, trying hard not to close my eyes, when he entered the room and sat on the couch.
My Mum described, in detail, to my Dad how my Gran had died, sobbing at every word.
"She just winked at Gordon, and that was it. She was gone."
Tears had been trickling down my cheeks the whole way through this "horrific" tale.
My Uncle Norman had caught the early train from Nottingham and arrived just before tea-time. I walked out of the living room to get my dinner, a hamburger on a roll, when I bumped into him.
He was usually so cheerful on his visits. He always made me sit on his knee like a baby. (Which I hated!) None of that this time.
The energy he had, had drained away. His face was grey, like the sky outside, which symbolised the kind of day it had been. His golden hair was duller than usual. He was my Gran's only son and now his Mother was gone.
We just exchanged sad looks as we passed each other.
Most of my hambuger was given to my best friend who was visiting me. I wasn't really in the mood for talking to her. Her stay was brief.
The mood in the house was depressed and mournful after everyone left.
I couldn't sleep in my own room, so I sneaked through to my sisters room. I was so scared that I would die on my own. I felt safer sleeping at the bottom of my sisters bed.
My Mum came through in the early hours of the morning and gave us a telling off for talking. She was up most of the night just sitting in the living room, doing nothing in particular.........
...........Then it came to me. Five words that expressed my feelings.
"I will always love you"
Michelle xxxx
When I visited my Grans grave the next day all of my sadness drained away.
The grave, where she lay, was swamped with flowers. I knew deep down, she was loved and one day I would see her again.
