Who do I turn to?
As I sit there on the sofa, I keep looking back and fourth at the television. Mum sits beside me, I can smell the scent of her perfume, it’s sweet and welcoming. Deep inside of me I really want to tell my mum everything that is on my mind. I feel resentful though because this is my mum. How am I supposed to just tell her everything, it’s so deep? She looks at me and asks me if there is something wrong. I look at her trying not to show my worried eyes and tell her I am fine. She gives me the chance to tell her, and I let it go how can I bring it up now? I glance at her quickly I can see her mind ticking away, she knows me, she knows that I am lying and that I have something troubling me. Again she asks me if I have something on my mind. This time I sit and look at her trying to find the courage inside of me to tell her my problem.
I am sitting with my best friend, Georgina, she is crying, she is exhausted by melancholy. I can feel the tension in the air. All I want is for her to feel better. I can smell the sweetness of her freshly washed bed covers, her bedroom seems strange, as though this is the first time I have stepped across the boundary of her door. I still have no idea what is wrong, she seems distraught, but I feel it not right to ask until she feels ready to tell me. I sit on her bed comforting her as she cries into my shoulder. I feel the tears run down my back and soak into my favourite T-shirt. They are cold on my skin as they run down the back of my neck. It sends a shivering sensation all the way through my body and reaches my toes. She sits up and wipes her eyes, she takes a tissue from a box next to her bed, and everything seems to be happening in slow motion. Her eyes are red and raw. Her face looks tired after the exhaustion of crying, I feel for her now more than I ever have. My best friend is troubling and it’s hurting me as well. She begins to mumble through her sodden tissue. I don’t really understand anything she says to me but I catch small parts. It sounds serious, something I know I need to understand in full. I stop her, mid sentence, tell her to calm down, wash her face and tell me so I can understand her.