How can the person-centred core conditions help me to understand and change my life?

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Richard Small                                       Introduction to Counselling

[14/01/04]

How can the person-centred core conditions help me to understand and change my life?

In 1957 a groundbreaking paper entitled ‘The Necessary and Sufficient Conditions of Therapeutic Personality Change’ was published in the United States.  The author of the paper was the founding father of the person-centred model in counselling, Carl Rogers.  Rogers had joined the University of Chicago in 1945 and it was there that he developed his theory.  It grew out of Abraham Maslow’s humanistic approach to counselling and developed speed because of the number of new patients needing counselling after World War II.

Rogers’ paper included six ‘core conditions’ which he felt were vital for a successful therapeutic relationship.  These were later narrowed down to three conditions: congruence, unconditional positive regard and empathy.  During the course of this essay I will briefly examine what is meant by each three of these elements and then I will explore how they can help me to understand and change my life for the better.

Congruence is the single most distinctive aspect of the person-centred approach.  In being congruent, the therapist aims at all times to be a real person with the client, to ‘throw away the white coat’.  Rogers believed that successful therapeutic relationships should be based along similar lines to successful personal relationships.  A congruent therapist seeks to maintain awareness of his/her own thoughts and feelings during the counselling sessions and, when appropriate, brings these into the open.  In other words it is about being a ‘real’ person working with your client on an equal footing.

It is actually quite a scary idea.  Hiding behind a professional façade is an easy thing to do.  I wonder how many people could claim to be congruent during their day-to-day life.  At present I would say I am congruent at certain periods but at others I certainly hide myself away,  presenting an image I feel people will be more comfortable with.  Often I would say I am not even congruent with myself.

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The idea of being ‘real’ all the time is a very odd thought indeed.  I believe in the last year I have made large steps towards greater congruence.  When I suffered from depression I felt it was very important to hide my feelings and ‘put on a happy face’.  I certainly feel very differently now.  I am far more together, as if my internal and outer selves are becoming one.  I am finding it easier to be honest about my thoughts and feelings and also learning when to share these with others.

Part of the problem I believe ...

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