“As soon as you plug it in, the performer can run educational titles, encyclopaedias, atlases and games. They all work, first time.”
Its appeal to the reader is very strong. It makes the reader comfortable about computers. I think the advert is appealing to people who find it hard to use computers. Everything is set up for the buyer. All you need to do is plug in!
The writer mentions all the features that the computer has. Also, the writer gives an example of how the computer can be used and at the same time mentioning some of the features.
“The whole family can watch TV and teletext and even edit home videos.”
The writer has put a little paragraph in a smaller font next to the picture of a computer. This paragraph makes the reader realise what saving that they will make. “that could normally cost you up to £800” It also states everything is programmed in for you.
The writer talks negatively about computers but makes the computer that he is advertising seem very positive. He chooses his words very carefully to describe the computer’s benefits.
The computer is made specifically for families and for a reasonable price, which encourages the reader to buy. When someone feels that they would not be able to handle the computer or may need help there is a helpline which is reassurance that they will not be left alone with the computer.
Also the another saving at hand this help line is free. This computer is made available nation-wide, which is a benefit for the Macintosh Company. Also there are a number of places to buy the computer from. In fine print at the bottom of the page it states were the computer can be bought. “Allders, Argos, Byte computer, Comet, Currys, Dixons, Harrods, John Lewis, Makro, Micro Anyika, PC World, Silicia, Staples and Tempo.” The computers are available in fourteen shops. This even helps persuade the reader more because there are more places to buy the computer. More convenience is created for the potential buyer. The information on the advert might not have been enough for the reader so there is an Apple information centre. The writer even found more ways to persuade the reader by supplying a free video.
“Our comprehensive information pack includes a free video.”
I am sure that the “Apple Information Centre” has trained staff to help convince other people who rang them, to buy their computers.
I noticed a little catch that I am sure most readers wouldn’t notice. On the tenth paragraph it says “prices start at just £1,099†” This sign “†” indicates that there is more to that assertion. I read the fine print and it says
“Apple Dealers and Retailers are free to set their own prices.”
Unfortunately the price indicated is a deception. The price for the computer is very unclear and can be a surprise to go to the shop and see a much higher price than expected. But the reader may have created so much desire for this computer that it wouldn’t really matter regardless of the price.
Overall the writer’s use of language was very enticing; I didn’t feel it was not too formal. It makes you want to read on to find out what else is on offer. As a whole text A is very powerful. Its layout is creative. There are pictures to illustrate what they are talking about. Also borders around the title. Furthermore, there were three columns. Furthermore the font size was a reasonable size to read.
Text B is advertising an IBM computer. It starts off with a big, bold title, which ask a rhetorical question “What’s inside an Aptiva?” This made me think exactly ‘what is inside an aptiva?’ This immediately involves the reader. The writer took an informal approach to the advertisement. It kept on repeating the words ‘stuff’. I feel that here the writer is trying to involve readers who are not really into computers and making it sound ‘cool’ by using the word “stuff”
“Stuff. All the stuff you can imagine. Loud, colourful, fast-moving, enjoyable stuff. Stuff for adults. Stuff for kids. Stuff for dogs.”
I believe that in the first paragraph the writer does use the word “stuff” a little too much. The writer may perceive computers to certain readers as boring (Like how I felt when I read it). On the positive side this extract shows use of colloquialisms. This is a feature of non-standard English. The word “stuff” is appropriate for a conversation, and here this involves the reader even more than before. The writer attempted to put a joke in there. An asterisk next to where it said
“Stuff for dogs!”
And further down it has a footnote saying
“OK, maybe not stuff for dogs.”
The layout of Text B is very simple and plain. It is presented in one column. The tone of the text is light hearted dull with a joke in each of the first two sections. Each paragraph has a bold sub-heading to start it. It states the subject of what it is going to talk about. For example, in under the heading “Fun Stuff” it would talk about all the “fun stuff” that the computer has to offer. Each sub-heading repeats the word “stuff”.
The word “stuff” begins to be a bore and turn off. Instead of explaining what the computer can do the first paragraph gives examples of games. Here the writer uses figurative language to show examples of the fun that can be experienced if the computer was bought.
“Adults will love Jump Start Kindergarten and Magic Theatre. Kids will adore Sport Illustrated and Undersea Adventure.”
Most of the advert gives situations and add in the features
“Watch space craft zoom smoothly past you in 64-bit graphics.”
This quotation creates a desire to play the game. This is a good method of persuading someone.
The writer appeals to the reader by saying how ‘quickly it is to install’.
“Aptiva is designed to be cut out of the box and running in around 5 minutes.”
This shows that the computer is very efficient and quick to use, and also indicates no hassle.
The best paragraph of the whole advert, I think, is the fifth one. It mentions some of the features straight away.
“Advanced Internet, Fax and Telephony features with Mwave.”
After that the writer points out that the “Mum and Dad can bring their work home” as a benefit of those features just mentioned.
The writer has few humorous comments. It says mum and dad can bring their work home “(if you let them)”. They provide help line so that the reader knows there will be help provided if needed whatever time of the week or day. The humour may be intended to discourage the buyers to dwell on the price. The advert has a powerful punchline. “Aptiva. It’s whatever you want”. Near the end of the article there is a picture of the computer, which helps persuade the reader knowing that the computer is not unattractive. They also provide an information line for customers that may have representatives to help persuade people to buy the computer. They used another way of convincing the reader by allowing them to use a demonstration model at TOYS R US. A potential customer may be contemplating on whether to buy the computer or not. The customers’ opinion about the computer on show will determine whether he or she will buy it. They are looking to see if it is value for money and if it meets their requirements.
This computer was appealing to young people and adults alike.
“Stuff for adults, Stuff for kids”
Throughout the advert emotive language was used to create a sense of humour for the reader. Personally I thought that was a great approach most readers would expect computers to be taken very seriously but this advert shows the fun aspect to computers. A lot of figurative language was used to describe the features of the computer.
“Watch space craft zoom smoothly past you in 64-bit graphics.”
Out of the two adverts I definitely feel that Text A is the much better advert. It appeals to the reader more and I find it much more persuasive. Also the presentational features within text A are a great deal better than Text B. The writer of Text A use very persuasive language. Also more was written in text A than in text B. Furthermore the price for text A was much cheaper than the computer in text B. But the price for text was indecisive, and could change according to the store it was sold in. The price for the ‘Macintosh Performa’ was £1,099. The price for the IBM was £1,799. The readers are being deceived about the price in text A. The advertisement states that prices start at just £1,099. I observed that text B needed more presentational features to it. Text B structure was plain, but affective. There was a lot of humour and colloquialisms inputted into the advertisement. Text B uses some humour so do that the reader wouldn’t dwell on the price. On the other hand text A has a more subtle approach. The emotive language was set out to make you giggle and show the fun side to computers. This advert had to be comical it is being sold at Toys “R” Us. On the other hand text A doesn’t have any colloquialisms. There was use of technical language in text A
“integrated CD-ROM drive”, “ ‘plug-and play’ printers”
If it was set out in more than one column and the writer described the computers features that helped persuade the reader. To persuade the reader text A associates computers with children, but stating that there computer is easy to use no frustration. Text B associates the computer with humour and presents the computer as fun to use. Text B tries encourage the reader to buy the product by giving jokes. That is a superior persuasive method. For text A I can’t think of any suggestions to improved the advertisement. The font size on text A as reasonable and easy to read on the other hand the font on text B was very small. Not everyone will be able to read that advertisement clearly it becomes unreadable. Some readers may have to strain to read that advertisement. All in all text A the Apple Macintosh Performa is the computer I would buy. Its cheaper, there is a support line, I could buy it from various shops and it seems to me that the Macintosh has much more features to it.
